hypocrite

ironic how my boss told me to better communicate with him on my whereabouts and yet no one has the slightest clue as to where he is today...studying for the gre? recovering from china jet lag? u know what? i don't fing care if you're a vp, you hypocrite! don't give me shit and expect me to follow your pointless rules and then do the same. 

tibetan proverb i'm trying to incorporate into my life: let go or be dragged. 

the shit we do for a paycheck. 

i recently signed a warning notice about not properly entering in vacation hours (i forgot and not to mention it was never explained to me) and for not working a sufficient amount of hours. bs. i said how is me working out 2x during the day if there is nothing to do any different from the co-workers sitting on their asses 8 hrs straight facebook stalking and watching movies? Really. Someone please explain this. I always have my phone on me so if anything comes up from work, I'm immediately able to attend to the task. 

What to Do

It is a very odd position - this having a lot of free time on my hands. In fact it feels like I have too much time on my hands. Not having a job and all. haha
I wonder what I'm supposed to do with myself.

I had an interview with a nonprofit organization today and well it didn't feel right.
I rescheduled an interview with a company that has gained reputable attention with Forbes.

I'm going home to Lacey for some time to earn some money until I find a job I really want.
Should be interesting...choosing what I want in life is a very difficult question.

fat kid moment

i just ate my feelings big time.
3 cupcakes consisting of a graham cracker crust, molten middle, super sugary frosting, one chocolate, one fruity...yeah, u get the picture.

it's funny. people's mentalities on sweets.
one co-worker said we should throw them away because no one needs the calories. can't argue with that. the same co-worker said she took one bite and said gross! not worth the calories.
another: no! i want to eat them!

but u know, i've been running every day 30 minutes straight and am loving it. been loving eating sweets in moderation too. it's funny how not having money restrains me from giving into my cravings. haha i had this bad habit of dropping everything when a craving kicked in and rushing to the grocery store to feed me soul. but it's self-destructive.

i went into work today adamant i wouldn't have anymore. cuz i had 3 yesterday. well that plan failed when my boss who i share an office with began quizzing me on which one was better and after too much talking on that one, i gave in.

and then i proceeded to let a friend drag me to a chinese buffet, that i had patronized 2 days prior mind you, where i indulged in more dessert: cookies, ice cream, sponge cake. and just when i thought i was done using food as a soul-soother. jeeze louise!! lol

as much as i wish i could eat whatever and whenever i want we know that it's not healthy. lol

harder to accept though than one would think.

anyway, i gave in at no cost...ha, to my pocketbook anyway. waistline, that's a different story. i've been so sad about my friend that i was falling for. more on that someday.

p.s. for a fun read on pop culture's definition of fat kid moment go here!

THIS WORLD SUCKS!! I NEED A NEW ONE.

Beware: Woe is me post.
There's no beating around the bush.
I'm heartbroken.
I'm watching "friends" throw their lives away on pot.
I'm sans money.
Makes for really good writing material at least.

Look on the brightside Kay, you're still drug, alcohol, & smoke free. And that's something to be proud of because, you know, as you see it RUINS life!

welcome to provotown mama!

mama comes to town tomorrow! happy day! this marks grownuphood for me, i feel. picking her up from the airport, having her stay at my pad and all. 

her and i. top of empire state building. may 2011.

the way he looks at her...holy wow

James and Aubrey Sneep Peep from Geoff Boothby / Landshark on Vimeo.